Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Five.....Five Dollar....Five Dollar peice of shit
I went to Subway out of desperation and confusion the other evening. My pantry was bare, the grocery store sounded threatening and I needed an immediate grind solution. I was lured into the infamous sando sluthouse by that catchy "five-dollar foot long" jingle they've been saturating the airwaves with - what will the ad-wizards think of next? I won't lie, 5 bones for a foot of sando did sound like a pretty solid value in these tough economic times.
My Italian BMT samich was prepared with no care or love, with ingredients haphazardly laid down in the meat holders (buns) and then wrapped up in an aggressive "fuck you, you picky bastard" manner. To make matters worse the surly sandwich "artist" couldn't even tell me what BMT stands for - and the B is not for bacon believe it or not. People have killed for less!!
Anyways I won't go into too much detail, because everyone knows subway's story. It was a footlong of sandwich without a soul, crusty stale buns, and vegetables and meat that were dumpster bound in just a few more hours. Also, it only measured 10.5 " - not a foot at all! I was shocked at this, and am considering a lawsuit for false advertising.
Beware fellow grinders, Subway is for elementary samwhich youth who don't know any better and people who don't grind with their heart. Think twice before you commit to the subway, and never.....NEVER, get the tuna.
1/5 Grind Medallions